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Chronic--what?--cles Of Rock Show Twas the week before Christmas, and all through the clubs Not a singer was singing, not even in dub With all this silence, this peace and this lack The Rock Show could only take time and look back Last winter a MOLLY was FLOGGED in good cheer, So I brought a Ukrainian who spilled then her beer She stepped on some toes and started a fight With some shoeless soul, it wasn't quite right Then GWAR came to town and we were all fodder For buckets of blood and slime cannon water The GODDESS OF FUNK brought us forro and rhumba Then later danced with BATS named MAKUMBA THE DEVIL MAKES THREE and COOPER MCBEAN On St. Patrick's Day made quite a scene With gravel and pluck and harmonies tight Proved that a banjo makes everything right Then ZAP MAMA followed with voices so tight And filled up the RIO for all of the night OLD CROWS then put on a MEDICINE SHOW, The lights all went off, but they didn't go They brought out a lantern and huddled so near Then sang CC Rider and drove out the fear Summer brought TALIB and his Beautiful Struggle Of ghetto survival and beats that were juggled LHASA sang songs of her philosopher dad, Of reincarnation and how not to be sad Then ROBERT KEEN, that masculine wag Told us about HANK stuck in Philly in drag Nicotine and Gravy I think I'm going crazy Cause BECK'S up onstage, that boy is so amazing JOHN ELLIS comes from east Carolina What other word rhymes except for vagina? DAVID LEE ROTH is the king of bad taste But so entertaining for such a waste MARC RIBOT plays guitar with ironic smirks And gives every tune its own little quirk MONTEREY JAZZ had too much to see SCOFIELD and ROLLINS plus MEMPHIS WILLIE BILLY IDOL's career is a sign of the beast His rehashed moves must simply be ceased But CAKE came off as funny and fresh Though the autoslap could have used a rest MIDNITE played in an air of natural mystic Yet despite all the haze, they're still quite artistic MOS DEF came to Breed Love and play all the new shit And didn't comply when the drunks called for hits Then came this band with a singer named BONO How to sway an arena, I think they all know Now that these couplets of shows have been penned Its time to go now and call it "The End." Peter Koht [ Santa Cruz Week | Metroactive Central | Archives ]